Dye Hurts

This might be a TMI post so if you don't care to read further, please carry on with your blog hopping.

In this case it helps me to use my blog as a journal where I can discuss personal and intimate details about my current goals of getting pregnant.

Yesterday I went to the doctor for the HSG-
a Hysterosalpingogram (HSG), is a simple in-office procedure that determines whether the fallopian tubes are open, and assesses the presence and condition of fibroids or polyps in the uterine cavity. Very low radiation x-rays are used via fluoroscope, while iodine contrast dye is gently injected into the uterus and fallopian tubes. The procedure takes roughly 20 minutes.

I read up on the test before going and thought I was prepared for it. I drove the hour to Syracuse and got called in, within about 10 minutes.

Without sharing too much detail, I would have liked to shove that speculum up that nurse's ass. She wasn't that gentle, let's just say that. The doctor came in and chatted with me about doing yoga breathing. Asked if I had had painful cramps in the past, and I said sure, occasionally. He said that that was good- this wasn't much worse than that. But then I thought it fishy that he was telling me how to breathe throughout the test.

When the dye was inserted I just about leapt off the table. This pain was like none I've ever had before, in my abdomen. Period cramps, my ass. I tried to do the breathing but to no avail.
It was a rough 10 minutes. 

The good news is, the fallopian tubes are nice and clear with no blockage. So that ruled out any issues there with fertility. The doctor came in and chatted with me about the next steps. Sperm analysis.  A Laparoscopy to check for endometriosis. But then he recommended we go right into IVF.  I asked him in a panic, "but I thought there were still other tests before getting to that point?". And he said that with the amount of time we've been trying, doing drugs and insemination would be pointless. I tend to disagree. I would like to try everything before I have to dish out 10 grand. Thank you very much. This thought was in my head and never came out of my mouth.
I drove home in tears. Frustrated and defeated.  It was a tough day. I hope that the next time I go in there, I can be strong and demand to try everything instead of just assuming IVF is the only answer.  In the mean time, we are going to keep trying. I have heard stories that the HSG sometimes cleans things out enough that pregnancy is easier.

wish us luck.

My friend Alicia gave me this necklace to wear. She swears by Saint Gerard, and is pregnant with her second child now.  I think I may put it on a bracelet that I can wear every day. There is a sweet prayer on the back that I can read every day, to stay reminded of my ultimate goal.  I'm not a religious person but at this point, I will pray to the high heavens if it means getting pregnant. 

I don't have a whole lot of time left. I turn 38 on Friday.  I am looking forward to the birthday weekend. Honey is taking me to Saratoga so I can peruse the bead shop (saratoga beads rocks) and shop the shops, and a nice meal somewhere there. It should be a fun time.

Here's to hoping the week flies by.


  1. Lorelei, I have no wise words to give, but lots of love to send your way, and have a great birthday too:) Jane

  2. Hugs! Don't know if you've read this book, but it was a great help to me and I've given it to many friends in the past 11 years: http://www.amazon.com/Getting-Pregnant-What-Couples-Right/dp/0449906671/ref=sr_1_40?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1337079101&sr=1-40

    Enjoy you're time with your Hubby...sending you positive thoughts and prayers.

  3. Good luck and best wishes, Lorelei. I know it's not easy, but try to stay relaxed and just have faith that if it's meant to be, it's meant to be.

  4. Mis pensamientos y oraciones están contigo.

  5. I'm so sorry the road's been tough. And having a painful test on the heels of this past weekend stinks worse. Good luck good luck good luck.

  6. Lorelei, don't let the fertility specialists bully you. They (Duke drs) pretty much made me feel terrible when I was your age and trying for a second child with no success. I wish all the good luck possible with my whole heart. In my humble opinion, the *sperm analysis* should be the first thing doctors do because it is non-invasive. Did they not do that first? Why put you through painful procedures before checking that? As you can tell, I have strong feelings about this. I will be thinking fertile thoughts for you and sending positive vibes.

  7. Wishing you luck and sending supportive prayers your way.

  8. Anonymous5/15/2012

    It's not a pleasant procedure is it! And I'm sorry you didn't have the best nurse. But hang in there, read what you can about the various options and try to make the most informed decisions you can. I did IVF at 36 -- in my case ovulation seemed to be the problem, as in I didn't very often -- and we were lucky, because it worked! And my doctor was also of the opinion that it was better to get straight to the point rather than waffling around with less effective methods. But it's not their decision, it's yours, so take the time you need to work out what is best for you. Have a lovely birthday weekend!

  9. Hugs, my friend and all the best wishes in the world.

  10. Lorelei,

    I remember the HSP and the pain. I am surprised they did not advise you to take some meds prior to the procedure to help with cramping. I am sorry you had a horrible experience with it (thankful for the good news though!) Hopefully the HSP wil work it's magic on you!

    I have learned from my journey through infertility to be an advocate for myself. It is hard, but this is your journey, not your doctor's. We had a doctor that would make me cry frequently. No compassion, no bedside manner. I wanted to switch docs. This doc was an excellent doctor and had great results. In the end, we decided that we would rather have an excellent doc with poor bedside manner, than an okay doc with great bedside manner.

    Remember, you are the client and you have choices. Allow your Doctor to advise you, but the two if you make the decisions that are right for you! Be especially good to yourself! It is so sweet that your hubby is taking you away! Happy Birthday Friday!

    Sending hugs, peace and courage!

  11. I am so sorry that you have to experience having a baby the hardest way possible. I agree with you everything should be coincederd before jumping to IVF. It may possibly be something that has to do with your husband and not just your body. I do wish you luck on this journey. Try not to get too stressed out, It will not be good on your body. You will be a wonderful mother. And Have a wonderful birthday!!

  12. Do not give in to the doctor if you want to go another direction. Eleven years ago I needed a breast reduction because it was killing my back. I read up on it, familiarized myself with the options and what I'd be dealing with for scars, then spoke to my doctor. I told him I wanted a surgeon in Barrie because I had family there I could stay with. He said he dealt with the surgeon in London. the way he said it left me with the definite impression that I did his way or I didn't get it done with doctor approval so insurance would cover it >.< I was young and stupid so I caved. The surgeon did the same thing... he showed me a drawing of the cuts he would do... which was NOTHING like anything I'd read about online. I told him that I wanted the anchor cut ( the cut beneath the breasts and from the nipple down the center - fewer scars, fewer stretching issues )He said he was doing it this way. Again, it was in that tone that left me with the ' my way or else' kinda impression. Young and stupid so I caved. Visually not happy with the results, but the back pain has been greatly reduced and that was the point. I don;t mind the scars really, they're just parts of you with stories to tell lol But I regret allowing these two doctors take away my choices in something that would last a life time. Do your homework and stand by your beliefs. If you don't think you can say it to him face, write a letter. And there's always another doctor out there.

  13. Sending you good thoughts. You and hubby need to do what is best for you, even if it means getting a few second opinions. Sending fertile thoughts your way.

  14. Sending you lots of love.

  15. Thoughts and prayers for you and your husband throughout your journey!!

  16. Lori, I had a similar experience when I had an endometrial biopsy. I cramped - hard - for hours but had been told it would be mild and short-lived. Started reading up on it later and learned that many offices tell patients to premedicate with Tylenol or ibuprofen. I had even called in prior to the appointment to ask about the procedure and whether I needed to prep in any way, and they said no. My opinion of gynecologists is extremely low - they're the Neanderthals of the medical profession. Every other specialty has learned to deal with pain issues, but not these guys. Makes me wonder whether they were the dregs of their med school class. (Enough of that. I could go on and on.). Diana Keever is right: why would you not do a non-invasive test like a sperm analysis before even this procedure? Take control, girlfriend! I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you and sending good thoughts your way. I. Also think you should consider a second opinion on proceeding with IVF at this point. Ask around. See who else is good. Can't hurt to consider it and talk with other women in your area who have been through this.

  17. Wishing your luck. Don't let them bully you into something you don't want or aren't ready for. I agree with Jenny about considering a second opinion and trying to find other women who have been through that. Will keep you in my thoughts.

  18. Lorelei, I'm a long term follower of your blog (also really can't wait to meet you in person in Amesbury, MA! at the book signing). Let me just say thank-you for writing this. I do hope that your blogging about it helps you and I think it's really kind of you to post this for all of us to read. Obviously it's a very personal issue. At the same time, I feel like women don't have these talks often enough and a support network is incredibly important.

    I agree with some of the commenters above, I would get a second opinion on the IVF at this point. 10 grand is a lot of money and while obviously you want to become pregant, there may be other options. Take care!

  19. Lorelei - I am glad that you share on your blog. I don't think anyone needs to apologize for sharing on their blog. Your blog is your own and I personally like feeling an emotional connection to the blogs I read. I hope you feel better soon. I agree to try everything before IVF. My thoughts are with you for your dreams to come true!

  20. Oh I know haw heartbreaking and frustrating this all can be. Your story is so much like my friend Patty. She went thru every test in the book - even tried IVF and paid all that money and that too failed. She was beyond all hope and ready to give up. The company we worked for was moving out of town and we got laid off and of course she had no insurance and she got pregnant. God works in strange ways - she now has 2 boys. I don't know the answer but get other opinions and keep trying. I wish you all the luck in the world.

  21. Oh sweetie, I'm so sorry the day turned out like it did. I can't share the experience with you, but I can relate in some ways. Just remember--it's your money, your body, your choice.

    I love the St. Gerard medal your friend gave you--a lovely gesture. Happy birthday Friday. Celebrate in style, because you deserve it!

  22. Yep..that test was pretty uncomfortable..

    Please try to find a fert. dr in your area that will work with you.. There is no harm in not doing a few tries of IUI before trying IVF.. IUI is no big deal and the initial protocol should be clomid and IUI a few times and if you are producing enough eggs and not getting pregnant then continuing with IUI and adding injectables THEN hopping to IVF..

    my comment on your post is personal and totally opinionated so apologies in advance for getting right to the point and being blunt (from someone who has been there and was told "hung in there longer than any other patient in a long time") lol.

    Before and HSG most fertility Dr's wont even bother seeing a patient without getting sperm analysis and total work up on potential moms - so you should get all these tests done right off.. because if you switch Dr's, then you wont waste time doing it all over again. HSG's are usually done AFTER a few attempts at IUI..but its good to know that your tubes are clear and not scarred.. (check)

    You need to see an acupuncturist as well as a regular fertility Dr. I took higher doses of Fertility drugs than anyone I ever met, and the only factor that improved my hormone levels was acupuncture and herbal preparations -- Some people will tell you acupuncture is BS, but in my opinion Acupuncture and INfertility go together like peas and carrots..it def. helps.

    My Dr was amazing..he worked with me and tried really hard (but I had other factors going on beyond anyone's control) DO NOT BE AFRAID to switch your Dr. People are very vulnerable when they seek out fertility assistance and the procedures are so foreign and a little embarassing so they tend not evaluate their Dr, as they would with other types of medical conditions.. DONT if you Dr doesnt feel right., MOVE ON.. I did and it was the best move I ever made.. You do need to take control of this situation because you will find it very frustrating if things aren't going as planned.. But not to worry, people do get pregnant right away after their first IUI., so hopefully you will be one of them..

    I totally understand what you are going through -- If I can offer any help please message me..I wish for you a baby with all my heart!

  23. Ouch! The things women have to go through :( Don't worry, taking ibuprofin before hand doesn't help. I had a procedure and was advised to take ibuprofin before hand, and it still hurt like crazy. So you didn't miss out on anything. Here's hoping you're feel better today!

  24. Sue-Lin5/15/2012


    I don't have any similar personal experiences to share but I wish you all the best. I too would decline to dish out a whole load of $$ before trying everything else.

    All the best and have a fabulous birthday!

  25. Oh, I feel so bad for you, going through that painful procedure. It wasn't TMI, it's something that many share right along with you. Have you ever researched the good results from acupuncture? Many women respond very well - by becoming pregnant, of course! And you don't feel the needles, as many fear. There's nothing to lose by trying because acupuncture is so beneficial. Just adding some motherly advice to the mix! Have a wonderful weekend!

  26. Girl, I've been thinking of you a lot lately. I'm so sorry that you are having to go through all of this. Painful in so many ways. I've never told you this, but a couple of months ago when I was on vacation, shortly after you posted that you'd soon be starting with a fertility Dr, I had a dream that you had a baby girl. She was wearing footed pink pajamas with owls on them. I wish with all my heart that this dream comes true...

  27. Don't you hate it when male doctors pretend to know what menstrual cramps feel like?
    It sounds like you still have time to go with your instincts before plonking down the big bucks for IVF. Have a great birthday weekend. Who knows? You might just be naming your first child, "Saratoga!"

  28. So sorry to hear about your unpleasant doctor's visit. I am glad to hear everything checked out ok. I would suggest finding another doctor; one that you are comfortable with and has some decent bedside manner. If you don't have any recommendations from people, you can search for a good doctor on the internet. Once you narrow the location down, select some names then type in the name of the doctor with the word "reviews" after it in google. It will bring up pages with reviews of that particular doctor. Works like a charm!

    Go with your heart, your instinct. If you don't want to go into IVF right now, then you shouldn't. You are absolutely right in wanting to pursue other options first.

    Sending good thoughts your way! :)

  29. I was where you are 5 years ago. The doc told me the HSG wouldn't hurt anymore than bad cramps and the nurse was standing behind him shaking her head and rolling her eyes. That was when I knew it wasn't going to feel good. The nurse came over and held my hand, I think she regretted that! It is very painful, and leaves you feeling crampy and achy for hours. I am sorry no one prepared you better! We tried to get pregnant for 4 years, and had two miscarriages before we tried fertility stuff. Our doctor believes in starting at the begining and not jumping right into IVF. We have done IUI (intrauterine insemination) with clomid, and prevasid shots, and HCG shots. Basically the hormones make you produce multiple healthy eggs, the HCG makes you ovulate, then you do IUI. It worked the first time with our daughter, and we are doing it again now. It costs under $1000 for the meds, tests, and procedure. Having an "unexplained" fertility issue is not easy, and there are so many emotions. Hang in there, it is not easy, but it is so worth it! Everytime I look at my daughter I am so amazed and thankful to have her!
    Don't be afraid to change doctors, this is so personal, you have to be comfortable with your doc. I am fortunate to have two amazing fertility doctors that have been great! I did not try accupuncture but I have friends who did and said it worked when nothing was working, so you might give it a try. Also, when you husband goes in for the sperm analysis, it is a good idea to make sure you have sex at least 48 hours before, (tmi I know sorry) it really improves their count. You should also do this before IUI and IVF. I know you don't know me, but if you have any questions I would be glad to try and answer them. I know what you are going through, and it is one of the hardest things you can go through. I'll keep you in my prayres.

  30. Lorelei, so sorry you had a less than great Dr's appointment..this issue is so personal and stressful..but a relief they found you healthy..
    I think Lisa P makes some very sound points..
    also,stress can affect hormones and hormones affect everything..
    as an side, don't hesitate to speak up about your concerns..the Doctor won't know what's on your mind, otherwise.

  31. Big hugs for what you are going through. To mirror what several others have said...if you don't feel comfortable with this doctor (& nurse) - find someone different. I was on a similar journey for just a wee bit before another situation came up and took me down a different path. But, what I can tell you is that I've dealt with a gazillion doctors & what is as important as their competence is the way they treat you and that you are heard. When dealing with something so intimate. - you feel so very vulnerable. It is your body & for a doctor to dismiss your input - is totally BS. I see that Lisa brought up acupuncture & I hope you are able to look into that. I've been treated by two amazing Chinese woman acupuncturists & both of them were total healers. Both of them had files filled with fertility success stories - including lots of woman who had tried all of the conventional routes without success. I hope and pray that you can find a traditionally trained acupuncturist in your area who you & Joe could talk to. If you have any questions about the acupuncture piece, feel free to message me (wildmtnrose1@msn.com). Take care and be gentle with yourself. Enjoy a beautiful birthday celebration! Cheers!

  32. This comment has been removed by the author.

  33. (((((((hugs))))))) Thank you for sharing your story. Life isn't all sunshine and lollipops, and when I'm in a rough spot it helps to read how others are facing their challenges with strength, grace, tantrums -- human-ness. I wish you all the best.

  34. {{{{{{{{{{{{{Lorelei}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}. Are medical procedures a pain in the ass (as well as other places). While I am not a medical professional, and did not sleep at a Holiday Inn last night,I had a friend who eventually got pregnant using cough syrup(ingested not topically;-)

    This thins the mucous which needs thinning allowing the little swimmers to get to the goal. Don't ask me. . .my body contains an uber tipped uterus which never allowed me to conceive--a regret I try to assuage by telling myself that God has a purpose for whatever happens.

    Relax and enjoy your intimate moments. The baby will emerge as an expression of your love.

    All will be well!

    Mary Deis

  35. I was about 38 when we visited a fertility specialist who did similiar tests and told us the same thing - go straight to IVF. The success rate was maybe 30% which for anything else would be unacceptable - can you imagine if only 30% of people could find jobs? Upon leaving the hospital, we discovered our car had been stolen. Funny now, but awful then.

    We were able to find a infertility group through the hospital which introduced us to other couples who were experiencing similar issues, which was really helpful. As others have said, you need to do what is right for you and not let the medical profession push you down a certain path before you are ready. Knowing the motility of your husband's sperm is critical before you make any further decisions - if they aren't swimming, then IVF mayn ot be the best treatment.

    Good luck.

  36. Don't you just love how MEN doctors tell you that it won't be worse than cramps?! Ummmm, how would THEY know? I had a urologist tell me that when I had a cystoscopy (bladder is filled with water and scoped). Excuse my language here, but I wanted to put his nuts in a vice and crank it as tight as it would go. I'm praying for you to have a little birthday baby miracle.

  37. Thinking of you this week, dear one.

  38. Lori, I hate to say this out loud; It may not be true in this situation at all. But this may also give you more courage for standing up for yourself.

    There are medical studies that are showing that when a doctor has a financial stake in a clinic, certain procedures tend to be done more often than if the doctor simply has privileges at the clinic and sends his/her patients there. Of course there should never be financial motivations for something like this, but it sounds to me like there may be. ALSO, many medical decisions that doctors make, are made based on statistics. Statistically, the numbers may indicate that *probably* you should continue on to IVF, but that's probability and not medicine. This doctor seems to be basing his recommendation on statistics, not on you. I guess statistical information is better than nothing at all, and it may shed a little light on the subject, but that doesn't mean it's right for YOU.

    Can you feel us all holding hands with you? We're here.

  39. Ughhh. I had a uterine biopsy last week and I was told the same cramp line. It was much more painful - only mine did not last for more than a minute or so!

    Good luck Lorelei. I feel for what you are experiencing. I watched my sister go through extreme fertility struggles - but after persevering and doing her own research, some accupuncture, along with traditional treatments, she had a healthy baby boy last night!

    Everyone's situation is so different and it takes time and patience to work through it. My sister followed her heart and had the courage to switch doctors when she was not comfortable they were listening to her. When she was able to work in partnership with her doctor - things worked out. Hoping the best for you!

  40. Sending you lots of luck Lorelei, hope it all works out and you don't have to go through any more painful tests

  41. Happy earlier birthday Lorelei =)
    It has been a tough day for you *settle down*
    Maybe I also have the same problem with you. I've been married for two years, and until now, we have not been blessed with a child.
    We do not have the initiative to consult a medical. But we had planned, probably around August or September this year. So your story today, at least given an input about what I might be going through as well. Thank you for sharing =) and I wish you have a very magical miracle on your blessing friday birthday.

  42. Dear Lorelei, I'd like to share, as briefly as I can, my sister's story. After suffering an early miscarriage just months into her marriage, she mysteriously was unable to conceive for the next six years. At that point she was disappointed by another pregnancy loss, this time in the second trimester. Through all this time she received only the most rudimentary infertility investigation, as we live in an underserved region and travelling to a major centre was not an option. Another five years passed. I imagine she and her husband must have been near the end of hope. Imagine their joy when she became pregnant... for twins. It was a difficult, high-risk pregnancy complicated by a serious shortage of regional specialists. After numerous hospital stays she was given the gift of two healthy daughters, born in the 37th week and weighing over 6 lbs. each!

    Now, this may not qualify as a "miracle", but here is part 2: About a year later, she once again became pregnant... but learned it was tubal (ectopic). She naturally believed that with only one remaining fallopian tube, her reproductive history had concluded. She was mistaken. Very shortly she was expecting again, and her son was born at term weighing almost 10 lbs.

    Every time I see her amazing children I am reminded that they are with us because she never gave up. No, believing alone won't make it happen. But faith, in your instinct to choose whatever therapies support you, in your body's ability to meet great challenges, and in the strength of your spirit to overcome no matter how your story progresses: that faith needs to be your greatest companion as you move forward. And, since I DO believe (and it can't do any harm) I'll be saying few prayers for you! xoxo

  43. Lorelei~

    Have you thought of acupuncture???? Fertility acupuncture has helped a lot of people have children.
    Sending you prayers


  44. I'm sorry your HSG was so painful. I had one done when I was trying to get pregnant, but mine wasn't much worse than a more uncomfortable version of an annual pelvic exam. That may have been because I loaded up on the Advil before I went, though.

    I do think there's something to the old "cleaning out the pipes" theory that just having the test done can help clear the way to getting pregnant.

    Also, there are a LOT of options before you head straight to IVF.

    Assuming no endometriosis and sperm count is good, you can try Clomid which is a pill that just bumps up your ovulation process. You can do 3-6 cycles of it (gradually increasing the dose) each time and then they ultrasound your ovaries every day and tell you exactly when to "go for it". I'd tried for 9 years to get pregnant...did two cycles of Clomid and bam! Now I have a 9 year old son :-)

    If Clomid isn't successful, there are injectable hormones that you do yourself.

    Only after that do people progress to IVF.

    Totally your decision, of course, but I agree you were right to be upset that the doctor was pushing to go straight to IVF.

    Oh, and I was exactly 38 when I got pregnant so don't be feeling like your time is running out...you've got some years yet.

    Hope you get some good results from this!


  45. Anonymous5/15/2012

    Hugs..and have a great birthday week:)

  46. Best of luck to you. It looks like you have some very good advice here from the comments.

  47. I'm sorry you had to go through that procedure, yuck. Although, my situation was different, I remember the feelings I had about having a baby, desperation mixed with hope. I will pray for a successful pregnancy for you!

  48. Hugs dear lady, and lots of healing, happy and fertile thoughts going your way. Hang in there. Like Dory says (from the Finding Nemo movie, just watched that this past weekend so its in my head) - "Just keep swimming, swimming, swimming" - just keep moving forward!

    I've never had that particular test, but I had a uterine biopsy a couple of years ago and it was quite painful, so I can and do feel your pain! You're in my thoughts, take care.

  49. *sending positive baby-makin' vibes your way*

    I have so many beefs with modern medicine (some of which were named above)- a doc's decisions can (and often are) based on greed, money, drug companies...instead of what is best for the patient. Follow your instincts and if it doesn't feel right- listen! You know your body best.

    Oh and every man in the world should have to have menstrual cramps for one day, says I.

    hang in there!

  50. I'm with you on the HSG, it was more painful than anything I had gone through. I did have to change doctors in order to get pregnant, and am forever grateful for that. Don't accept their "statistics" noise, you are a person, not a number. I'm always willing to talk, and will continue to keep you in my prayers. Much love~

  51. Oh Lorelei, my heart bleeds for you...
    I went down the same road you are going down. I remember the ache and wanting that fills your being up until you think you will catch on fire. And when you are so vunerable and don't know how to fix the problem yourself you have no idea where to start or stand up for yourself.
    I charted my temp every morning and knew when I was ovulating. It helped focus what I could do to help and when it was time to jump my hubbies bones.:) Very inexpensive and doesn't require a doctor visit.
    Nothing seemed wrong with either my husband or myself but no babies were coming. After five years we happened to both be on medication- his for infection and mine for a raging yeast invection and I got pregnant.
    My prayers and good wishes go your way.
    I hope you enjoy your birthday.

  52. I don't have much more to add to all these wonderful comments other than I'm praying for you and Joe! Hang in there, I'm so sorry that the HSG was so awful! {{HUGS}}

  53. I will join you in holding your hopes up for validation and encouragement - with all my heart.

  54. I've been there too, I remember sobbing all the way home from the hospital when I found out it was me and we weren't going to be able to have kids. It was horrible. But the fertility route helps many many people and you have a lot of options open - I hope the dye test works it's magic with you, I know a lot of the time it works. And if it doesn't - do not let the dr bully you. This is your body, your family and your decision. He shouldn't be the one to make it.
    Blessings and lots of hugs to you and Joe

  55. Anonymous5/15/2012


    I've read your blog for a long time and appreciate your honesty in everything. It took me 2 years to get my first child (at 33) and another 3 years of trying to get the second (at 38). We wanted a bigger family and looking back I guess I should have started earlier. Who knew it was going to take so long. But I'm blessed with a boy and a girl and hope the same for you. Just keep your spirits up, know your options forwards and backwards, and don't get pressured or discouraged.

    Laura M.

  56. Been there, done that! After an after-40 surprise pregnancy that turned into miscarriage at 10 weeks, and fertility issues afterwards, I feel your pain. Really. I did this HSG test, and grinned, and beared it. I knew it would be painful..my beautiful ob/gyn fully explained the test to me. After that came back clean, I endured an endometrial biopsy test gladly (btw, it was just as painful). All came back clean. I had already done the clomid route with no result, so I was gung ho to go forward into whatever my dr. prescribed. After a few rounds of injectibles, and no viable eggs to show, I was pretty much shown the door. Long story - short, my boy Ben, was born within the year with no fertility help...just God's, or nature, or whatever! My point, being if you've even gotten this far, is, DONT. GIVE. UP. HOPE! Okay? And don't let those asshole doctors tell you that you are too old at 30 something...my boy, who was conceived, naturally, at age 42 is doing \beautifully!

  57. I had that procedure too. Didn't I tell you that it kills? Now the husbands sperm count and motility is the first step here. Cheep and painless. Get that done ASAP.

  58. sorry you had to could through that awful procedure. i swear doctors and nurses today are so cold. i've had some terrible ones lately. wishing you and your husband all the best.

  59. How did I miss this post? Anyway, I wish you all the luck in the world, Love! I have been there with the infertility issues. Josh and I tried for 6 years, now we have Nora! Do you remember me telling you I had an astrology reading five years ago? This astrologist wasn't just any old astrologist, she is guided. She is incredible! She told me all kinds of things that have come to fruition, but She also told me I would have Nora in my reading and she even told me when I would have her. I didn't completely believe at the time, but it did help me to relax and know if it was meant to be, it would be. I would buy you a reading for your birthday, but I need your time of birth and place of birth along with your birth date to have your chart done. Please send me your information. It would be a fun birthday present, especially if you've never had your chart done before! It's really fun to learn more about yourself.

  60. Lorelei, There are so many wonderful things written above about women that have gone through similar things - and I see hope, support, and put your boots and keep treading through, and a few comments that just make you giggle (I love women that understand and tell you their mind!) I hope that after this procedure maybe it will open up a window so you don't have to endure more like it. And Yay! you for sticking to your gut instincts about not jumping into IVF. See what happens first, do take those other steps before getting there. Don't give up. Don't overstress. Keep down the road you are on... Big hugs to you! Enjoy your birthday on Friday! It is an honor to know someone so cool is also celebrating :)

  61. I should send you a little Kokopelli. They're the fertility diety. When the hubby and I were trying to get pregnant, nothing happened for awhile, then I went to Sedona w/my sister and brother and stood in one of those vortex circles and picked up a kokopelli that someone had left and said a little 'wish' in my head to the Universe and bam! I think I found out I was pregnant the next month! My siblings still joke about it, but hey - whatever works, right?! Best wishes Lorelei - hope things work out the way you and the hubby want them to!

  62. Oh Miss Lorelei. I am so sorry that this is happening. If wishes count for anything, there are so many millions of them hovering over you from all parts of the globe trying to align the stars to make this dream come true. You are very honest and brave to share this story with all of us. I hope that you can find some peace in your heart to face all that will come. I will be adding your name to my prayers. Wishing you the best birthday. Enjoy the day.

  63. mary s5/17/2012

    thank you so much for sharing your life - i will be thinking, hoping and praying for you from my part of the virtual and phyiscal world.

    fwiw, my children were born when I was 38, 40 and 42. keep the faith! :)

  64. Sending lots of love and good thoughts

  65. Argh my phone lost this long message I'd written! But you know I've shared virtually the same as you are so I am pulling for you.

  66. Lori--

    I had this same dye test too and it hurts like hell. I screamed, if that makes you feel any better. I'm not religeous at this point either, but I'm sending warm and caring thoughts, along with the empathy that comes from "been there done that." ((hugs))


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